Hammer and Nigel Poem Targets Midterm Candidates and Senate Races

The annual election cycle enters its final hours as local broadcasters continue their tradition of satirical commentary. On Monday, Hammer and Nigel released a new spoken-word piece titled 'Twas the Night Before Midterms.' The video serves as a prelude to Tuesday's voting, focusing on candidates in key states and national political figures.

The poem mocks several specific political actions and public statements. It references Indiana State Senator Beau Bayh lifting weights in his Washington, D.C. office. It also critiques Max Engling for using a bullhorn to distinguish himself from Diego Morales. The writers note that Libertarian candidate Laurie Shillings campaigned with class, while Greg Ballard started his own party to separate himself from the Republican establishment.

National figures feature prominently in the satire. The piece mentions Bernie Sanders expressing frustration that death row inmates cannot vote. A clip of Sanders is included, where he argues that imprisonment for sexual assault or murder should not remove an individual's inherent American right to participate in democracy. The poem also references Donald Trump holding consecutive rallies and Joe Biden telling a group of minorities that they are not Black.

Other targets include Piker, who the poem claims thinks September 11 was neat, and Talarico, who is described as being in Texas and afraid to eat meat. The text encourages viewers to fire Ryan Mears. It concludes with a quote from Judge Kavanaugh admitting he drank beer, sometimes too much, while enjoying it.

The broadcast urges viewers to vote and avoid being placed on Hammer's bad list. The segment ends with a standard holiday greeting to all. The release occurs one day before the general election, a timing that aligns with the show's previous annual traditions.